Pretty Tumblr Themes

I really need to write something useful here

outrights:

cuddle me or give me cash either is acceptable 

faptrick:

which one of u deleted my caption wtf

faptrick:

which one of u deleted my caption wtf

favourite stan lee cameos
shithowdy:

Fun fact: if you approach an employee and insist that they go ‘check the back’ for an item that’s not on the shelf, there is a 90% chance that they’ll go to the back room, scratch their ass and check their text messages for five minutes, and come back out with a sympathetic smile and a ‘Sorry!’ because they know without even looking that the stock isn’t there.

shithowdy:

Fun fact: if you approach an employee and insist that they go ‘check the back’ for an item that’s not on the shelf, there is a 90% chance that they’ll go to the back room, scratch their ass and check their text messages for five minutes, and come back out with a sympathetic smile and a ‘Sorry!’ because they know without even looking that the stock isn’t there.

yologna:

i let my laundry basket overflow because i like to push my limits in life

randominternet:

Strange things with weird people

randominternet:

Strange things with weird people

ofwnchesters:

no but guys

someone told our professor that i had a fantastic pick up line and they made me tell her

DO YOU KNOW
HOW AWKWARD IT IS
TO LOOK YOUR PROFESSOR IN THE EYE AND SAY
“I MAY NOT GO DOWN IN HISTORY BUT I’LL GO DOWN ON YOU”

AND THEN

SHE RESPONDS

“I’M GOING TO TRY THAT ON MY HUSBAND”

dONE